Mark Mabry

Go Chris.

A while back, Chris and Heidi Powell called me to do some publicity photos for Chris. After an incredibly energetic shoot they sat me down and showed me a preview of Extreme Makeover Weight Loss Edition, of which Chris is host. Amazing, emotional, inspiring. I'm cheering for them. I'm a Chris fan. It debuts tonight on ABC at 9:00 Pacific Time. Here are a couple of the shots and a preview. Go Chris. 

 

 

Art, Death, and a Lie Detector Test. Memorial Day '11.

 

Every man gives his life for what he believes. Every woman gives her life for what she believes. Sometimes people believe in little or nothing. . . . Our life is all we have, and we live it as we believe in living it, and then it’s gone. But to surrender what you are, and live without belief—that’s more terrible than dying—more terrible than dying young. [Joan of Lorraine, act 2, interlude 3]

 Excuse the drugstore philosophy, but a lot of things are making sense today and maybe this post is my way of saying to the world, “I’m on board.” In the words Switchfoot, “we are meant to live for so much more”. 

 Is there really that big of a difference between being alive and dead? Just the day to day stuff I suppose. Is someone’s physical presence really all that much stronger than the idea of that person? 

 Once my kids have sold the house, liquidated the rights to my pictures, and found a guilt -free way to deal with an attic full of my knick-knacks, all that is left of me is maybe a picture of me in their office and the effect that I had on their life. The picture of me will be eventually be remodeled out and make it’s way to their attic, but idea of me won’t be... for better or worse.  

 So the big scramble early in life isn’t about getting comfortable so we can “find ourselves” while reading The Road Less Traveled on the beach. The frantic search for self has to happen right now! Because if we kick the bucket while we’re still trying to gear up for the search then nobody will ever know what we would have found or even how we planned on finding it. There will be lives untouched where we should have had influence. We’ll be unspent money in the bank, unused running shoes, untold truth, ... a bunch of almosts. A beautiful failure is far more glorious than a beautiful almost.  

 Why haven’t I kissed my wife yet today? Thanked someone? Created something? Asked God what to do? 

 (This eventually gets to our soldiers, hang in there with me) 

 Maybe a good Memorial Day question is “What do I believe?” “What will define me?” There are plenty of people that die, everyone who isn’t currently alive actually, that’s a pretty big group. Of those that have died, people who are memorialized are those that clung to an idea more than they clung to comfort or life itself. See Jesus Christ. 

 If I was hooked to a polygraph and asked to list the things I know are true... How much would the needle bounce? Do I really have a belief that transcends death?   

Imagine the questions that would freak us out a little... Here is part of my make-believe interrogation. (Q = question from interrogator , R= my response)

    Q.    “Mark do you believe in Jesus?”

    R.     “Of course. He’s our Savior.” 

    Q. “Keep talking...”

    R. “He still lives and his sacrifice makes it possible for us to go back to God...and...”

 *needle bounces a little as I try to be increasingly insightful. There are things that I’ve been too busy preaching and not busy enough living. Where does my knowledge stop and faith begin. Faith questions will all probably make the needle wiggle a little bit. Such is faith- right? This line of questioning is incredibly invasive! 

    Q.    “Obviously you need to explore the depth of your ‘surety’ on some things. Let me toss you a softball question Mark. Do you love your Family?”

    R.     “Phew, thanks. Yes, of course. They are the most important people in my life.”

    Q.    “Oh, good. No needle movement on this one. Mark, if you really do love them as it appears from the test, why do you say “I’m busy” sometimes when you’re really not?  

    *Needle begins to bounce again.... 

 OK, so the imaginary polygraph is a little more painful than imagining should be. 

 But it starts to reveal a bottom line. The bottom line is there are things I want to believe and things I already do believe. The things that we do believe make all the difference. They are what define who we are after we die, reread the quote at the top. 

 Which brings me to Memorializing our military today... What makes them so worthy of memorialization? It’s exactly that they died for a cause bigger than any of us individually. It’s that they put their lives second position to a belief. 

When we see a military statue or painting or photograph we think of freedom, love, family, America,... lofty ideas. I would venture to say that every art peace ever created pays homage to an idea rather than a person. That is why great women and men over the ages have commissioned portraits of themselves... because they are committed to the ideas they espouse, not just the memory of their faces. 

So we go and put flowers on their grave... Who is that for? They’ve already proven that they are driven by something higher than recognition. Flowers on the grave are for us, the living. Abe Lincoln said it best in his Gettysburg address...

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion--

To honor our dead, we dedicate ourselves to their beliefs and ideas. 

In that sense, the dead- the ones that truly believed in something, are just as powerful now as they were when they walked among us. 

To Jesus, thank you for the hope that I can be better than I am now. 

To Thomas Jefferson, thank you for the idea that I should be free to think. 

To Grandpa Mabry, thank you for the idea of enthusiasm. 

To Grandma Rhoda (whom I never knew, but heard stories), thanks for playing the harmonica while standing on your head and believing in the power of a laugh or a smile. 

To our Soldiers living and dead, thank you for every small task you perform- as well as every great task-  thank you for the idea of FREEDOM being bigger than death. 

 

 

 

 

 

Motorcycles with Sidecars.

Just found this in the NY Times. I'm not a big fan of big, fast, motorcycles. At least not of me riding them. For some reason I just don't like it. I do have a craiglist scooter that I sometimes drive to ASU. The coolest thing I do on the scooter is jump the curb... My kids and their friends stand in the front yard and enjoy that show. But the idea of a motorcycle with a sidecar and my wife and I cruising up Highway 1, is cool... Stopping at B&Bs all the way up the coast. Sorry kids, not invited. 

I shot Colin and Heather with a sidecar once... Here you guy. 

 

Subversion, Blaga, and my Sister the Carbivore.

On to my youngest sister Mckensie. We ate slowly tonight at Tapas Papas and Fritas in Scottsdale. Solid C- dining experience. It was Spanish dining, Spainish that is, not Mexican. At first I felt so cultured.  Then I realized that I’d much rather be eating at Filibertos. But my little sister McKensie, whose second language is apparently English- long story... she pounded all of the bread at our table. At one point she nearly nipped off my finger when I went for it. She read about carb loading a few years ago and claims it helps her get ready for some impending marathon... The only problem is that there is no impending marathon. She ran a half-marathon once without a ton of training, but she carb loaded for three days before lighting it up on the course. 

 Now for an interesting tidbit. 

Word of the day (not that I really have one) is subversive. Something subversive intends to harm or derail the cause of established authority. Luican Blaga, a Romanian philosopher and poet was deemed subversive by the ruling communists because of his anticommunist literary and philosophical stance. Not a really safe way to be standing in the mid 40s in Romania. Lucky for him, he wasn’t killed on the spot because of his notoriety. He was just made to disappear from the literary limelight and placed into a librarian roll at the University of Cluj (where I’ll be staying this Summer for a month). Since he was no longer allowed to compose, he turned to translation instead. He spent years translating everyone from Faust to T.S. Eliot... all along his high brow translation spoke such a deep seeded Romanian cultural dialect that the communists didn’t even notice that his “translations” were all skewed toward subverting communism and pointing out flaws in communist thought.

 P.S. Communism is horrible. Really bad all the way around. It does nothing but darken, plunder, and depress. Thinkers like Blaga, who fought communism on a cultural level from behind enemy lines are among the bravest and most clever writers in history. 

Subversion, if you listen for it you’ll hear it. If you look for it... look out. 

Going to take a second tomorrow to plan memorial day. Lessons from the dead are the only lessons punctuated by something other than a question mark.  

 

T.S. Eliot, "Anxiety is the hand maiden of creativity." 

 

Somewhere between a Baseball Player and a Nascar Driver

One of my most recent joys has been reconnecting with an old best friend... Occasionally you hook up with people after a long time and it seems like time never passed and you say something like “man, it’s like seven years apart never happened”. But not for me this time. This seven years really did happen. I miss ages 27-33 with my best buddy. Time lost. 

 It turns out that over the last bunch of years he gained success on the internet. That little cartoon guy that goes fat-skinny-fat-skinny on the corner of your screen while you’re trying to read Drudge report... Yeah, that was probably his. Hopefully you bought a bottle of African Mango or Viagra from him! Or both. (*If it lasts longer than 4 hours call Mike!, or think about baseball). 

 Over the same period of time I spiked my google ranking to the 5th most popular Mark M. I landed right between Mark Mulder, the pro baseball player, and Mark Martin- a NASCAR driver. Of the top Mark M’s, I’m probably the poorest! Ehem, probably?  Perhaps the happiest. Probably I eat the most pizza. Definitely the biggest nomad. For sure the hottest wife... The former Ms. Tara Bawden.  

So lunch went like this... 

Mike, “dude, I want a print from Reflections.” 

Me, “Ok, I’ll get you one if you buy my lunch.” 

Mike, “how come they’re not on the internet?”

 Me, “They are... We spent a ton on the website.”

 Mike (laughing), “Dude, your prints are invisible online!” 

Me (not yet realizing that I’m the #5 Mark M), “oh, are you going to eat the rest of your burrito?”

So long story short. I now have a boss pushing me on the internet... Another boss. That makes six of them including Tara, Marky, Bo, Ava, and Canon. 

 So, I blog again. I'll be on the internet more, so get some ice cream and a kleenex. 

 So here is my blogging commitment... Total candor and a little more consistency. I’m starting my masters this summer. It’s basically non-fiction writing masters  from Arizona State University. So I might turn boring, but I'm bound to either do something dumb or brilliant, or both. 

 I’ll also be in Romania for all of July and into August. My undergrad degree is in Russian  Studies so that includes a lot of studies in the Balkans and Baltic regions of Eastern and Central Europe. The long term affects of communism have been on my mind, so I’m going to study it and write a book with two outstanding professors, Professor Ileana Orlich (ASU Professor of the Year 2011, and Radu Ardevan (Professor of History at Cluj in Romania. It’s nice to be the dumbest one on the ticket... But hey, I’m creeping up on Mark Mulder! I'll host an incredible Passed Mulder Party when it happens. Seriously, look what I already did to his arm. 

 

*photo of me courtesy of someone's blog...